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Mast: the Phallic Monument of the Seas

A mast is a tall, erect structure typically found on sailing vessels. It is the epitome of phallic symbolism, standing proud and tall, signaling its dominance over the surrounding bodies of water.

Masts are typically made of wood, but can also be constructed from metals like aluminum, steel, and stainless steel. They come in varying lengths and sizes, with some towering up to 100 meters in height. Just imagine, that’s almost as tall as the Statue of Liberty!

Sailors have a special relationship with masts, often referring to them as “her” or “she” and assigning them specific, often vulgar, nicknames. It’s not uncommon to hear sailors shout out things like “hold onto her, she’s a slippery one!”

But masts aren’t just for show. They serve an important purpose in sailing, holding up the sails and allowing the vessel to move through the water with ease. Without a mast, a sailing ship would just be a floating tub, going nowhere fast.

Masts are also a great way to show off one’s wealth and power. In the 17th and 18th centuries, wealthy merchants and nobles would compete to have the tallest and most ornate masts on their ships. It was a status symbol, much like owning a luxury car today.

However, masts also have a downside. Despite their impressive height, they can also be quite problematic. For one, they often get in the way of low bridges and power lines. And if a mast breaks while sailing, it can cause serious damage to the ship and even put its crew in danger.

In conclusion, the mast may be the phallic symbol of the seas, but it’s also an essential part of sailing. So the next time you see a mast, remember to show some respect and maybe even give it a little nod of appreciation. After all, it’s doing some pretty heavy lifting out there on the water.