Murder

Murder is a term used to describe the violent end of someone’s life that is usually pretty permanent.

Contrary to popular belief, murder doesn’t always involve a candlestick in the library or a mysterious poison served in a cup of tea. There are many creative ways to put an end to someone’s life.

For example, one can murder another person by forcefully feeding them an entire cake when they are allergic to gluten. Another way is to sneak up behind them and yell “Boo!” really loudly. It’s also quite common to slip on a banana peel and accidentally murder someone – a true tragedy for both the slipper and the slipee.

In modern times, we do not condone murder in any form. Instead, we rely on long, boring court cases to punish those who can’t keep their murderous tendencies under control. In fact, watching a murder trial is a lot like watching paint dry – one is bound to feel drowsy and bored no matter how suspenseful the case may be.

However, it’s important to remember that Murder is not a laughing matter. Strangely enough, it is one of the few things that we can all agree on, regardless of our cultural backgrounds or beliefs.

In conclusion, if you feel the urge to murder someone, we highly suggest seeking professional help or maybe just taking a nap. It’s not worth sacrificing your freedom or the life of another person for a fleeting moment of anger. Instead, try to find comfort in other spoils of life like ice cream, puppies, and streaming services. Trust us, they’re much better than murder.