Netherlands

The Netherlands, also known as Holland, is a tiny country in Western Europe that’s known for its windmills, colorful tulips, and enthusiastic embrace of bicycles.

Geography

The Netherlands is a flat country, which means that there’s not a lot of altitude-related humor to be found here. Instead, the Dutch make up for it by building impressive dykes, which can stop floods and also provide a handy excuse for why they can’t come to your party (“Sorry, my dyke needs me tonight”).

History

The Dutch are a proud people with a long and storied history. They were once a major naval power and had colonies all over the world, which means that they were really good at finding new things to complain about (“Ugh, have you tried going to India during monsoon season? It’s the absolute worst.”).

Culture

The Dutch are famous for their love of cheese, stroopwafels, and other delicious treats. They’re also the inventors of wooden shoes, which are great if you want to look like a cartoon character or if you’re trying to silently sneak up on someone (assuming they can’t hear your clomping all the way down the street).

In conclusion, the Netherlands is a small but mighty country that has contributed a lot to the world. And if you’re ever lucky enough to visit, be sure to try the haring (raw herring) - it’s an acquired taste, but it’s sure to be a memorable experience!