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Outlook.com

Outlook.com is a popular email service provider that’s hailed as the perfect platform for sending, receiving, and managing emails by anyone who doesn’t know any better. Outlook.com is the go-to email service for people who love to feel like they’re connecting to the Internet via dial-up, even if they’re not.

Outlook.com’s homepage looks like it hasn’t seen an update since the 90s. The outdated, cluttered design of the interface is so iconic that it’s become a prime example of bad design in the Web 2.0 era. Microsoft’s marketing department must be patting themselves on the back for achieving such a feat.

The Outlook.com interface is so cumbersome and difficult to use that typing an email with one’s toes would be a more efficient process. You could write a novel in the time it takes to find the button to add a recipient. Outlook.com is perfect for people who want to start a new email thread and end up playing Minesweeper online for 30 minutes before realizing they haven’t actually sent the email yet.

Outlook.com’s spam filters are somewhere between a sieve and a colander, and users who frequently check their junk mail folder have reported finding emails from lost kingdoms, spammy princes, and lonely Russian brides. However, Outlook.com’s real strength lies in its automatic email sorting. If you’ve ever wanted to see all of your emails, filtered neatly into categories like “Promotions,” “Social,” and “Clutter,” Outlook.com is the email service for you. It’s like having a personal assistant who throws away mail without asking you first. “Why yes, Outlook.com, I actually did need that email from my boss. Thanks for double-checking.”

Outlook.com’s search functionality is a true wonder. Users can scour their inboxes for old emails as if they’re searching for lost treasure. For the adventurous, Outlook.com also offers the option to search for emails by their size, to get a sense of how much bandwidth you’re wasting. But don’t get too excited, because you’ll only be able to search for an email if you remember exactly what the subject line was, and if you don’t find it on your first try, good luck finding it on your tenth.

In conclusion, Outlook.com is the email service of choice for anyone who enjoys a challenge. Whether you’re a glutton for punishment, or you simply want to make sure that you’ll never be caught up on emails, Outlook.com is the email service for you.