Doomer 🌑🌧

The Doomer is a peculiar creature that emerged from the depths of the internet back in the 2010s. Resembling a hybrid of a recluse and a pessimist, the Doomer thrives on dark thoughts and an overwhelming sense of hopelessness. 🙄😔

Characteristics 😶

Doomers can be identified by their distinct physical appearances and personalities. They are usually found in their natural habitats, which include parents’ basements, dimly lit bedrooms, and local coffee shops that play ironically sad music. 👨‍💻🎶

Physical Appearance 🧐

Doomers are notoriously known for their unkempt appearance. They rock an all-black wardrobe, making them blend seamlessly into any Joy Division cover band. 👻🌑 A common accessory is a black beanie, worn regardless of the weather. This is essential in ensuring a constant state of brooding darkness. 🧢

Doomers also have a penchant for sporting thick-rimmed glasses, not for better vision but for the aesthetic. 👓😎 The glasses serve as a metaphorical shield, allowing them to analyze the world through a pessimistic lens.

Personality Traits 😩

Doomers thrive on negativity and existential despair. A typical conversation with a Doomer might go like this:

Person A: “How are you today?” Doomer: “Existence is a futile journey filled with disappointment and suffering. Can’t complain.”

Doomers tend to possess an encyclopedic knowledge of the most obscure and irrelevant topics. They pride themselves on their proficiency in dark humor, ironically laughing at the misfortunes of others because, well, life is a joke. 🤣😭

Lifestyle 🖥🎮

Doomers embrace solitude and are skilled in the art of isolation. They find comfort in video games, anime, and lurking in the darkest corners of the internet. This allows them to avoid any potential happiness or sunlight that may sneak into their lives. 🎮🖥🌦

They often perceive the world as a giant dumpster fire, incapable of finding any glimmer of hope. They contemplate nihilistic philosophies while listening to Radiohead and pondering the meaninglessness of life. 🎶🤔💭

Doomer Subspecies 🏰🎭

Over time, various subspecies of Doomers have evolved. Each has its own unique set of traits and interests:

Boomer Doomer 🤔💼

The Boomer Doomer represents an older generation’s take on the Doomer lifestyle. They lament a world filled with technology that they struggle to understand. Their favorite activities include grumbling about young people and reminiscing about times when phones had cords. ☎️😩

Zoomer Doomer 🌍🌐

The Zoomer Doomer is the teenage variant of the Doomer family. They are surrounded by constant FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) due to social media, yet they still manage to complain about everything. They have an uncanny ability to blame society’s problems on avocado toast and Fortnite. 🥑🎮

Gloomer Doomer 🌧️🌫️

The Gloomer Doomer is a weather-dependent subcategory. Their mood is directly influenced by the climate. When it’s gloomy and raining, they reach peak Doomer levels. On sunny days, however, they transform into something we like to call a “Bloomer”—a happy, optimistic creature. ☔🌞

Doomer vs. Bloomer 🌻🎉

A natural enemy of the Doomer is the Bloomer—an excessively happy and positive person who views the world through rose-colored glasses. 🌈🌺 The Doomer and the Bloomer are constantly locked in an eternal battle of opposing worldviews, sparking endless debates in comment sections across the internet.

While the Bloomer may irritate and confuse Doomers, they secretly envy their ability to find joy in life’s simplest moments. However, Doomers will never admit this, as such an admission would go against their aesthetic. 😶🙃

Future of the Doomer 🚀🌌

The future of the Doomer remains uncertain. With the constant evolution of internet culture, it’s difficult to predict how the Doomer species will adapt or if they will eventually transform into the elusive and optimistic creature known as the “Loomer.” 🔮🌈🦄

Only time will tell if the Doomer will continue to brood in the shadows or if they will finally find the courage to step into the light. Until then, we can only hope the Doomers and Bloomers find some common ground and enjoy a good cup of coffee together. ☕😌