Gymnasium 🏋️‍♀️🏋️‍♂️

Introduction

A gymnasium is a place where people go to pretend to work out, while secretly plotting their next meal. It is a den of deception where people wear fashionable workout clothes to showcase their commitment to fitness, but spend half of their time on social media.

Equipment

Treadmill 🏃‍♀️

The treadmill is a device that people use to walk or run in place while staring at a screen that shows them how many calories they are burning. It is also a great way to practice your balance skills as you desperately try not to fall off the moving platform.

Dumbbells 🏋️‍♀️

Dumbbells are small weights that are used to convince others that you are capable of hefting heavy things. However, most people use them to take selfies, trying to find the perfect angle that screams “I’m totally ripped!”

Exercise Bike 🚴‍♀️

The exercise bike is a magical contraption that allows you to pedal into oblivion while going absolutely nowhere. It gives you the illusion of getting fit without ever having to leave the comfort of the gym. Just make sure to avoid eye contact with anyone while you’re on it.

Weight Machines 💪

Weight machines are designed to make you feel like a superhero while attempting to navigate a complicated maze of levers and pulleys. You pull, push, and twist various parts of your body, hoping that you’re doing it right and not just creating a hilarious spectacle for others.

Etiquette

Sweating 💦

Sweating is a natural process that occurs when you exert yourself physically. However, it is considered polite to wipe off your sweat using a towel, instead of decorating the gym equipment with your bodily fluids. Remember, no one wants to sit in your perspiration puddles!

Grunting and Groaning 🤭

While it’s important to challenge yourself, let’s all agree that grunting and groaning like a dying walrus is not necessary. Your primal noises may scare fellow gym-goers and make them question if they entered a wildlife sanctuary instead of a fitness center.

Mirror Selfies 🤳

Mirrors in the gym are primarily meant for checking your form and making sure your outfit is on point. However, some people mistake them for personal photo studios and shamelessly take selfie after selfie. Just make sure not to collide with someone who’s genuinely working out while you’re perfecting your pout!

Conclusion

So, the gymnasium is a place where people go to pretend they’re fitness fanatics, take countless selfies, and invent new ways to avoid breaking a sweat. It’s a world full of contradictions, where the quest for physical fitness often takes a backseat to looking good on social media. But hey, at least you burned a couple of calories scrolling through this article, right? 😄🍕