Kilogram

The kilogram, also known as “the large one”, is a unit of measurement that will never fail to make you feel self-conscious about your weight.

The unit was first defined as the mass of a particular cylinder made of platinum-iridium alloy called the International Prototype of the Kilogram. This prototype, which is kept at the International Bureau of Weights and Measures, is responsible for keeping all other kilograms in line.

This means that if the International Prototype ever got stolen, we’d be totally screwed. It’s a good thing we have round-the-clock security, although it’s not completely clear what they would do if someone showed up and attempted to steal a huge hunk of metal.

The kilogram is exactly the mass of a liter of water, which basically means that if you drink a liter of water, you’ve just gained one kilogram. Yes, it’s that simple. So whenever you feel the need to boast about losing a few kilos, just remember that you could easily put them back on with a single chug of water.

But you know what they say – it’s not the size that matters, it’s how you measure it. So next time you step on a scale and feel disappointed with the number you see, just remember that your worth cannot be measured in kilograms. Unless, of course, you’re a scientist trying to measure the mass of something. In that case, yeah, kilograms are pretty important.

In conclusion, if you are ever feeling down in the dumps about your weight, just remember that a kilogram is just a number. And if all else fails, just put down the donut and go for a jog.