Laptop

Definition: A portable computing device designed to drain your bank account while providing you with a masochistic typing experience.

History

In the year 1981, the first laptop was invented by Adam Osborne. This ancient device weighed in at a whopping 24 pounds, was the size of a suitcase, and boasted a screen the size of a postage stamp.

Since then, laptops have come a long way, but have still managed to maintain their ability to give you back pain and make your eyes strain after only a few hours of use.

Features

Laptops come with a variety of features, such as:

• A keyboard that is perfectly sized to cramp your hands and cause typos.
• A trackpad on which it is impossible to find the cursor.
• A screen that reflects every light source in the room, making you feel like you’re trying to work on a mirror.
• A battery that will last exactly 10 minutes before dying, just as you’re about to finish your important document.

Uses

Laptops are used for a variety of purposes, including:

• Working from home (even though you’d rather be doing anything else)
• Taking notes in class (preferably while also scrolling through social media)
• Streaming movies (which will inevitably cause your laptop to overheat and shut down just before the climax)
• Gaming (just kidding, no one actually games on a laptop)

Conclusion

In conclusion, the laptop is a piece of technology that has managed to remain both a vital tool and a continuous source of agony. While they have come a long way since the days of the Osborne 1, there is always room for improvement - like a keyboard that massages your fingers or a screen that transports you into a virtual world without causing eye strain. Until then, we will soldier on, cursing our laptops while simultaneously relying on them for our every need.