Malware
Malware is a type of computer software designed to make you rethink that decision you made to not major in computer science. It is a portmanteau of “malicious” and “software,” which is an ironic way of describing it since it’s neither soft nor nice.
There are various types of malware out there, ranging from “I wish I hadn’t clicked on that link” viruses to “I should’ve just bought a new computer” trojans. One thing they all have in common is that they’re designed to mess up your computer and make your life miserable.
Some people argue that malware is just a sign that humans have become too reliant on technology. Others argue that the people who create malware are just creative geniuses who are bored with regular video games. Whatever the reason, malware exists and it’s best to learn how to avoid it.
Some common types of malware include:
Viruses: These are programs that replicate themselves and infect other files on your computer. They’re like a virus, but with less sneezing.
Worms: These are similar to viruses but they don’t need to attach themselves to an existing file. They can spread on their own, like a worm wriggling through the dirt.
Trojan horses: These bad boys pretend to be harmless programs, but once you download them, they unleash a world of pain on your computer. It’s like inviting a horse into your house and realizing too late that it’s actually a Trojan horse filled with angry Greeks.
Ransomware: This is a particularly nasty type of malware that locks down your computer and demands that you pay a ransom to get it unlocked. It’s like being held hostage by your own computer.
In conclusion, malware is the villain of the digital age. It’s a reminder that even in 2021, not everything is sunshine and rainbows. So, if you ever see a pop-up that says “Congratulations, you’ve won a free iPad!” just remember, there’s no such thing as a free iPad.