Montana

Welcome to Montana, the land of Big Sky Country, cowboys, rugged terrain, and a whole lot of nothing else!

Montana is a state located in the western region of the United States, known for its vast landscapes, world-famous national parks, and drinking water that contains more cow feces than actual H2O.

The state is home to over a million people, which is about one person per 10 acres of land. The people of Montana are often described as friendly, hardworking, and slightly suspicious of anyone from out of town. If you’re visiting Montana, be sure to pack a sense of humor and a gallon of hand sanitizer.

Montana is home to several famous national parks, including Yellowstone and Glacier, where tourists flock annually to see the natural beauty of the state and to watch bears steal their picnic baskets.

The state is also known for its world-renowned fly fishing, where anglers come from all over the world to fish for trout and to avoid eye contact with the elk.

If you’re looking for nightlife in Montana, you’re out of luck. The only things open after 7 pm are the occasional bar, a gas station or two, and the local Walmart.

In Montana, the official state sport is rodeo, and the official state bird is the western meadowlark. However, locals will tell you that the real state bird is the mosquito, and the real state sport is trying to outrun them.

Montana is a state rich in history and culture, but don’t let that distract you from the fact that the state’s main export is bison poop.

So, whether you’re a resident or a visitor, be sure to keep your wits about you, your hand sanitizer close, and most importantly, bring plenty of bug spray. Montana is a beautiful and unique state, but don’t get too close to the bison. Trust us on this one.