Orkney

Orkney, known to its inhabitants as “Orkiss” or “Orknay”, is a remote archipelago located off the coast of Scotland. It is said that Orkney was once inhabited by fierce Vikings who raided and pillaged their way across the seas, but now it’s mostly just a bunch of sheep, some seals, and a few hundred hardy locals.

The main town in Orkney is Kirkwall, which is famous for its impressive St. Magnus Cathedral, a testament to the island’s history of artistic and architectural excellence. Legend has it that the cathedral was built by a group of drunken Vikings who, after losing a bet to the locals, decided to put their carpentry skills to use instead of just smashing things up.

Orkney is also home to the famous Ring of Brodgar, a mysterious stone circle that has stumped archaeologists for decades. Some believe it was a site for ancient rituals or sacrifices, while others speculate that it was just an elaborate prank played by bored Orcadians. Either way, it’s a popular tourist spot, especially for those who are fans of standing around in fields looking at rocks.

Despite its remote location, Orkney has made significant contributions to the world at large. It is said that the island’s inhabitants were the first to invent the concept of “outfit repeaters”, and have even been known to wear the same jumper for multiple days in a row without shame. Additionally, Orkney is considered by many to be the home of the Scottish delicacy known as “haggis”, which is a savory pudding made from sheep organs, oatmeal, and a healthy dose of denial.

All in all, Orkney is a beautiful and fascinating place, full of history, mystery, and sheep. So if you’re ever in the mood for a holiday that’s a little bit off the beaten path, come visit Orkney. We promise you won’t regret it (unless you’re allergic to wool).