William the Conqueror

William the Conqueror, also known as William the Bastard, was a duke of Normandy and a man with a lot of moxie. He is best known for being a conqueror, hence his nickname. But before he became a conqueror, he was just a guy with a chip on his shoulder.

William was born illegitimate, which means he was the result of a naughty fling between his mother and some random guy who wasn’t his father. As a result, he grew up feeling like he had something to prove. He was scrappy, fearless, and had a knack for strategy.

When William became Duke of Normandy in 1035, he was only 7 years old. But he didn’t let his youth hold him back. He spent the next 20 years consolidating his power, building castles, and generally being a badass.

In 1066, William decided he was ready to conquer something bigger than Normandy. He set his sights on England and, with a fleet of ships and a motley crew of soldiers, he invaded the country. The Battle of Hastings was hard-fought, but William’s army emerged victorious.

Once he was king of England, William didn’t waste any time - he started building castles, draining swamps, and generally imposing his will on the land. He was a man with big ambitions and no patience for anyone who got in his way.

Despite his fearsome reputation, William had a soft side. He was a devoted husband to his queen, Matilda, and he loved spending time with his children. He also had a wicked sense of humor - he once famously offered his son, Henry, a kiss for every castle he could capture. Henry captured so many castles that William had to stop him before he ran out of kisses.

William the Conqueror died in 1087, but his legacy lives on. He was a conqueror, a builder, and a man with a chip on his shoulder. But above all, he was a guy who wasn’t afraid to go after what he wanted - even if it meant invading a whole other country.