Cold: The Ultimate Guide to Feeling Absolutely Miserable
If you’ve ever needed a reason to cuddle up under a blanket and avoid the outside world, look no further than “cold.” This pesky virus is responsible for more sick days than any other malady, and has been the bane of humanity since the dawn of time (or at least since the first caveman sneezed in the face of his wife).
Symptoms
If you’ve ever experienced a cold, you know the drill: runny nose, scratchy throat, cough, fever, chills, and an overall feeling of exhaustion that makes you want to curl up in a ball and never leave your bed. It’s like a hangover mixed with the flu, but without the excuse of having had fun the night before.
Treatment
Despite the efforts of modern medicine, there is still no cure for the common cold. This means you’re stuck with it until your immune system finally kicks it to the curb (usually within a week or so). In the meantime, your best bet is to load up on Vitamin C, drink plenty of fluids, and watch as much Netflix as humanly possible.
Prevention
The best way to avoid getting a cold is to live in a bubble and never leave your house. But if you’re one of those crazy people who actually enjoys interacting with other humans, there are a few things you can do to decrease your chances of catching a cold:
- Wash your hands religiously (and avoid touching your face)
- Stay away from sick people (you can pick them out by their runny noses and constant coughing)
- Boost your immune system with healthy foods and regular exercise (but let’s be real, who has time for that?)
Fun Facts
- The average person gets between 2-4 colds per year (which explains why we’re all so miserable most of the time).
- There are over 200 different viruses that can cause a cold, so you never know what you’re going to get (kind of like a box of chocolates, but way less fun).
- Contrary to popular belief, going outside in cold weather does not actually give you a cold (but it does make it harder for your body to fight off viruses, so it’s still a good excuse to stay inside).
So there you have it, folks: everything you never wanted to know about the common cold. Don’t worry, though, it’s only a matter of time before the next virus comes along and takes its place as the most annoying illness around. Cheers to that!