East India Company: The Original Corporate Raiders

The East India Company, also known as the British East India Company, was a private corporate entity that operated from the 17th to 19th century. Founded in 1600, it was initially involved in trading spices and textiles from the East Indies (present-day Indonesia), but quickly realized there was more money to be made in exploiting India’s vast riches.

The Company’s motto was “Avarice 4 Life,” and it lived up to its reputation as one of the most ruthless corporations in history. It basically took over India’s economy and government, acting as both a merchant and a political power. It had its own army, owned entire cities, and ran the opium trade like a well-oiled dope machine.

The Company wasn’t just content with making a profit, though. It had a fondness for cultural appropriation and stole everything from Indian cuisine to music to fashion (they even introduced the necktie to Europe). They also played a pivotal role in the spread of the English language, which is why we now say things like “the cat’s out of the bag” and “give the Devil his due.”

However, the East India Company wasn’t all bad. It did bring the English tea drinking habit to the masses, which, let’s be honest, is a pretty big deal. It also inadvertently helped spark the Indian independence movement, which eventually led to the end of British colonial rule. So, thanks for that, East India Company. We’ll pour one out for you tonight, along with a nice cuppa.