Pierre, South Dakota: The Capital of Boredom

Located smack dab in the middle of nowhere, Pierre, South Dakota is a shining example of what happens when a city tries to be something it’s not. Sitting on the banks of the mighty Missouri River, it is known for being the capital of the great state of South Dakota, and for absolutely nothing else.

Pierre’s inhabitants, known as Pierrians (try saying that three times fast), are some of the nicest people you will ever meet. But let’s be honest, they’re also some of the most boring.

The city’s biggest attraction, the South Dakota state capitol building, is a majestic structure that looks like something straight out of Hogwarts. Unfortunately, it’s also about as lively as a history museum. The only time you’ll see anything exciting here is during the annual legislative session, and even then it’s just a bunch of politicians arguing about taxes. Yawn.

If that’s not enough to put you to sleep, take a stroll through Capitol Lake, Pierre’s tranquil body of water that’s home to some of the laziest geese you’ll ever encounter. These feathered friends have made it their life’s mission to annoy the joggers and bikers who dare to interrupt their nap time.

Feeling adventurous? Then head on over to Steamboat Park, located on the banks of the Missouri River. Here you’ll find a statue of Lewis and Clark, two explorers who would rather be anywhere else than Pierre, South Dakota.

But don’t worry, Pierrians have found a way to spice up their boring city: by naming everything after rocks. Seriously, everything. From the Pierre Street Talcum Powder Bank to the Granite Health Spa, you’ll never forget that you’re in a city that’s as exciting as watching rocks erode.

In conclusion, Pierre, South Dakota may be the capital of the state, but it’s also the capital of boredom. Visit at your own risk, and bring lots of caffeine.