Pallas: The Lesser-Known Greek Goddess of Wisdom

Pallas, also known as “Athena Who?” or “That Other Wisdom Goddess,” is a lesser-known figure in Greek mythology. Despite her lack of popularity, Pallas played an important role as the goddess of wisdom, warfare, and crafts.

Unlike her more famous counterpart, Athena, Pallas was not born fully-formed from the head of Zeus. In fact, her birth was quite traumatic. Pallas was the daughter of Triton, a sea god, and Athena’s best friend, whom she accidentally killed during a sparring match. To honor her friend’s memory, Athena incorporated the name “Pallas” into her own, becoming Athena Pallas or Pallas Athena.

Pallas was known for her intelligence and creativity, often inventing new weapons and tools for war. She even created the first bong, which she dubbed “The Oracle of Delphi.” However, her inventions didn’t always work as intended. Her “Artificial Owl,” designed to spy on enemies, ended up being a complete flop, as it really just looked like a regular owl wearing a top hat.

Despite her goddess status, Pallas was not immune to human emotions. She had a tumultuous love life, with many suitors vying for her attention. Zeus even offered her a seat on Mount Olympus if she would become his wife, but she turned him down in favor of spending her time making gloriously impractical weapons. Pallas eventually settled down with a mortal man, but her marriage was plagued with drama. Her husband, Kranos, was jealous of her intelligence and frequently tried to one-up her with his own inventions. Pallas ended up divorcing him and taking half of his workshop in the settlement.

Pallas may not be as well-known as her sister Athena, but she left her mark on Greek mythology with her intelligence, creativity, and general disdain for practicality. She may not have had the loudest voice in the room, but when she spoke, it was guaranteed to be a golden nugget of wisdom wrapped up in pure, unadulterated sass.

In conclusion, we should all strive to be a little more like Pallas - brilliant, inventive, sassy, and not always wearing a helmet.