Shetland Islands: Where the Sheep Outnumber the People

The Shetland Islands are a group of islands located off the northern coast of Scotland that are so remote, they make Siberia seem like a bustling metropolis. The islands are home to some of the friendliest people you’ll ever meet, as well as some of the fluffiest sheep you’ll ever lay eyes on. Seriously, they’re like walking clouds.

The islands are known for their rugged coastline, stunning wildlife, and unpredictable weather. One minute it’s sunshine and rainbows, the next it’s rain, hail, and wind so strong that it feels like you’re being hit by a freight train. But, hey, that’s just part of the charm.

Despite being a part of Scotland, the Shetland Islands have a strong Norse influence. In fact, the locals still celebrate Up Helly Aa, a Viking fire festival that involves dressing up in costumes and burning a replica Viking longship. It’s like Burning Man, but with more beards and fewer Instagram influencers.

Speaking of beards, the men of the Shetland Islands are known for their impressive facial hair. It’s said that the colder climate causes their beards to grow thicker and full of character. They take their beard grooming very seriously and have even created a Beard Club where they can come together and discuss the best oils and balms to keep their facial hair in top shape.

While the islands may seem like a sleepy backwater, they have a rich cultural heritage. Shetland has its own language, Shetlandic, which is heavily influenced by Old Norse. If you’re lucky, you might even catch a glimpse of the island’s traditional folk dance, the Up Helly Aa dance. Be warned, though, it involves a lot of spinning and can leave you feeling dizzy and disoriented.

So, if you’re looking for a place to get away from it all, where the people are friendly, the sheep are fluffy, and the beards are impressive, the Shetland Islands are the place for you. Just make sure you bring a thick coat and some seasickness pills. Trust us, you’ll need them.