The Judgement Of Paris: A Comedy In Three Acts
Act I: A Golden Apple Appears
The story of the Judgement of Paris begins with the ancient Greek gods and goddesses, all of whom were quite vain and argumentative. One day, at a party on Mount Olympus, a golden apple suddenly appeared, with the words “to the fairest” etched on its side. Chaos ensued as each goddess claimed herself to be the fairest and thus deserving of the golden fruit.
Act II: The Contest
To put an end to the argument, Zeus, King of the gods, chose a mortal man named Paris to judge which goddess was truly the fairest. So, Paris was whisked away from his home in Troy and brought to Olympus to begin his judging duties.
First, Aphrodite offered Paris the love of the most beautiful woman in the world as her prize. He was quite taken with this offer, but also quite nervous about cheating on his own wife.
Next, Hera offered power, wealth, and prestige in exchange for Paris’ vote. Paris was tempted by this offer, but knew that Hera was known for holding grudges and was afraid of reprisals.
Finally, Athena promised Paris victory in all battles and war. Paris was impressed, but as a man of peaceful pursuits, he didn’t think this was the best prize for him.
Act III: The Decision
After much deliberation, Paris finally made his decision. He gave the golden apple to Aphrodite, who promptly gave him the love of Helen, the most beautiful woman in the world (who was unfortunately already married to Menelaus, King of Sparta).
The judgement of Paris set off a chain of events that led to the Trojan War, in which Paris’ hometown, Troy, was besieged and destroyed by the Greeks. All because of a silly beauty contest.
Epilogue: A Lesson Learned?
Many people look at the Judgement of Paris as a cautionary tale of the dangers of pride, vanity, and the pursuit of beauty. However, we like to think of it as a reminder that sometimes even the biggest decisions in life can come down to a choice between beautiful women, great power, or military conquest. Always choose wisely.