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States of the United States

The United States of America is a country consisting of 50 states, each with its own unique culture and identity…and its fair share of quirks.

Alabama

Alabama is known for its love of football and fried foods. In fact, their state bird should really be the chicken wing.

Alaska

Ah, Alaska. Where the men are rugged and the winters are…also rugged. It’s the perfect place to go if you want to be left alone with your thoughts and a whole lot of snow.

Arizona

Arizona is a place of extremes. It’s the only state where you can experience both a blistering desert heat and ski slopes in the same day. Plus, they have the Grand Canyon. It’s literally a hole in the ground that people come from all over to marvel at.

Arkansas

Aside from being known for their excellent duck hunting, Arkansas is also known for Bill Clinton’s love affair with their state flower: the Daisy.

California

California is the land of Hollywood dreams and year-round sunshine. It’s also where people go to start over…and then promptly join a cult.

Colorado

Home to the Rocky Mountains and their legal weed, Colorado is the state where nature meets the munchies.

Connecticut

Connecticut is a place where everyone is either a hedge fund manager, a yacht owner, or both. They also have some pretty impressive historical mansions if you’re into that kind of thing.

Delaware

Delaware is a tiny state with a big personality. They pride themselves on being “The First State” to ratify the Constitution and have a Wilmington Blue Rocks minor league baseball team that boasts the best stadium food in the league.

Florida

Oh Florida. We could write a whole book on this state. It’s where old people go to die and where hurricanes go to party. It’s also the only state where you can legally marry your cousin.

Georgia

Georgia is known for their southern hospitality and delicious peaches. However, they’re also the state that brought us the lovely tradition of “painting with a broad brush”, in the form of the world’s most annoying font: Comic Sans.

Hawaii

Hawaii is paradise on earth. It’s where pineapples grow and the ocean is an Instagram filter come to life. It’s also where you’ll hear the term “shaka brah” more times than you’ll ever care to admit.

Idaho

Idaho is where potatoes are grown and people are born to be mild. It’s a great place for people who really like the outdoors…and their own company.

Illinois

Illinois is the birthplace of Abraham Lincoln and deep dish pizza. They also have a city (Chicago) that makes you feel like you’re living in a gangster movie, but with more hot dogs.

Indiana

Indiana is famous for the Indy 500 and being just a really nice place to live. They also have some pretty fantastic corn.

Iowa

Iowa is where the corn is tall and the people are…also tall. It’s the perfect place to go if you want to live on a farm or see what flatness really looks like.

Kansas

Kansas is known for tornadoes and Dorothy’s ruby slippers. However, they’re also the state that brought us the most confusing college mascot of all time: the Wichita State University’s Shockers.

Kentucky

Kentucky is the home of bourbon, bluegrass music, and the Kentucky Derby. It’s also where you can find Colonel Sanders’ own personal recipe for fried chicken.

Louisiana

Louisiana is the state where jazz was born and where everything is a little bit spicier. Mardi Gras is their unofficial national holiday and they have more alligators than they know what to do with.

Maine

Maine is where lobster is king and the people are humble…and a little odd. They have a forest full of Stephen King-inspired nightmares and a town (Eastport) where the only way to cross the water is via a hand-cranked cable ferry.

Maryland

Maryland is known for blue crabs and lacrosse. They’re also where you can find the world’s largest frying pan, in case you wanted to fry up a whole lot of blue crabs at once.

Massachusetts

Massachusetts is a place where history meets academia. In addition to the Salem witch trials and the Boston Tea Party, they also have Harvard, MIT, and the world’s largest collection of musty old books.

Michigan

Michigan is a place where cars are made and lakes are plentiful. Detroit may have a reputation for being the murder capital of the US, but they also have a museum dedicated to the importance of the toilet.

Minnesota

Minnesota is where hotdishes reign supreme and the people talk like the Swedish Chef from The Muppets. It’s also where you can find the world’s largest Paul Bunyan statue.

Mississippi

Mississippi is a place where sweet tea flows like a river and Elvis was born. It’s also where you’ll find the Vicksburg National Military Park, which is a great place to learn about the Civil War while also getting your steps in.

Missouri

Missouri is known for the Gateway Arch and their love of barbecue. They’re also where you’ll find the world’s largest fork (in Springfield) and a town (Knob Noster) with a name that’s fun to say.

Montana

Montana is big sky country and the perfect place to go if you want to disappear off the grid for a while. They also have a bar (The Sip ‘n Dip Lounge) where you can watch mermaids swim while you drink your cocktail.

Nebraska

Nebraska is where the world’s largest ball of stamps sits proudly alongside the beautiful Platte River. It’s also where Kool-Aid was invented, which is kind of a big deal.

Nevada

Nevada is where Las Vegas exists, which basically means it’s where mischief happens. It’s also where you can find the World Famous Bunny Ranch, if you’re into that kind of thing.

New Hampshire

New Hampshire is where the leaves change color and people only talk to their neighbors if they have to. It’s also where you’ll find the world’s longest candy counter (in Littleton), which is a true testament to the power of sugar.

New Jersey

New Jersey is where Snooki and The Situation come from, but it’s also home to the Atlantic City boardwalk and the world’s largest statue of a tooth (seriously).

New Mexico

New Mexico is where aliens supposedly landed and where desert meets art. It’s also where you can find the world’s largest pistachio statue, in case you were looking for a reason to get some salted nuts.

New York

Ah, New York. The city that never sleeps and the state that gave us the Statue of Liberty and Niagara Falls. It’s also where you can find a museum (the Mmuseumm) that’s only accessible through an alleyway.

North Carolina

North Carolina is where the Wright Brothers first took flight and where barbecue is life. They also have a town (Hickory) with an obsession for outhouses, which is…interesting.

North Dakota

North Dakota is where the buffalo roam and people go to get away from it all. They also have a roadside attraction called the Enchanted Highway, which features giant metal sculptures of things like grasshoppers and pheasants.

Ohio

Ohio is the birthplace of aviation and where you can find the world’s largest cuckoo clock, in case you’re a bird lover with a thing for keeping time.

Oklahoma

Oklahoma is where the wind comes sweeping down the plain and where Tornado Alley exists. It’s also where you’ll find the world’s largest concrete totem pole, because why not?

Oregon

Oregon is where the trees are tall and the people are…also tall. They’re also the state that brought us the world’s only intact and publicly accessible UFO sighting exhibit.

Pennsylvania

Pennsylvania is the birthplace of democracy and the home of Hershey’s chocolate. They’re also where you can find the world’s largest shoe, which is not made out of chocolate.

Rhode Island

Rhode Island is the smallest state with the longest name (officially it’s “The State of Rhode Island and Providence Plantations”). They’re also where you’ll find a library (the Athenaeum) with a secret bookcase door straight out of a Scooby Doo episode.

South Carolina

South Carolina is where the sweet tea is a religion and where Charleston exists, which is basically chocolate-box beautiful. They’re also where you’ll find a peach-shaped water tower (in Gaffney), which is actually kind of adorable.

South Dakota

South Dakota is where Mount Rushmore and the Badlands exist. They’re also where you’ll find Wall Drug, the greatest tourist trap of all time.

Tennessee

Tennessee is where country music reigns supreme and Dolly Parton is queen. They’re also where you can find Graceland, the home of Elvis Presley.

Texas

Texas is the land of big hats and even bigger egos. They’re also where you’ll find the world’s largest cowboy hat (in Odessa).

Utah

Utah is where the Mormons live and the skiing is top notch. They’re also where you’ll find a giant sculpture of a beehive (in Salt Lake City), because nothing says “the bee’s knees” quite like a 12-foot-tall insect abode.

Vermont

Vermont is where the leaves turn gold and maple syrup flows like water. They’re also the only state that legally allows the sale of unpasteurized milk, in case you were in the mood for some dairy-based danger.

Virginia

Virginia is where history is alive and well, and where peanuts are a major crop. They’re also the state that brought us the Luray Caverns, which are basically a naturally occurring wonder of the world.

Washington

Washington is where Starbucks began and where grunge music was born. They’re also where you can find the world’s largest egg (in Winlock), because no one puts an oversized ovum in the corner.

West Virginia

West Virginia is where the coal mines are and where the Hatfields and McCoys had their legendary feud. They’re also where you’ll find the world’s largest teapot (in Chester), because, well, why not?

Wisconsin

Wisconsin is where cheese is king and where the Green Bay Packers reign supreme. They’re also where you’ll find the world’s largest talking cow (in Neillsville), which is udderly amazing.

Wyoming

Wyoming is where the bison roam and the geysers spout. They’re also the state that brought us Devil’s Tower, which is basically a giant krispy treat for aliens.

And there you have it, folks. A humorous overview of the states in the United States. Remember to take all of this with a grain of salt (or sugar or cheese, depending on which state you’re in).